


Truth or Dare

by MagicalStranger13



Category: Strange Magic (2015)
Genre: F/M, Human AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-09
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-03-29 17:08:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3904201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicalStranger13/pseuds/MagicalStranger13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Truth or Dare on a stormy night with no power.  Could this be any more cliche?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm pretty happy with how this turned out!

“Food’s here!” Dawn called out, emerging from the dark hallway and gliding into the dimly lit living room, arms laden with two brown paper bags.  “And I am officially _broke_!”

Marianne, peered up at her in confusion from her spot on the floor where she’d been arranging pillows and blankets around the oval coffee table.

“How are you _broke_?  You had _more_ than enough to pay for _your_ half _and_ the tip!”

The blonde gnawed her lip and placed the Wok ‘n Roll food bags on the table beside the LED lantern. 

“I couldn’t _help_ it!  I felt so _bad_ for the guy!  Comin’ out here in a _monsoon_ to bring us all this stuff.”

“We made the order _before_ the storm hit, Dawn.”  Marianne said, digging out her chicken lo mein and fried rice.  “Besides, the guy delivers for the most popular Chinese place in town.  I’m sure he’s dealt with worse than a little rain.” 

She then pounded on the wood floor with her fist and shouted loud enough to wake the dead. 

“BOG!!!  DINNER!!!”          

Dawn rolled her eyes at her sister’s blasé attitude.  She always expected everyone in the world to have hides as thick as hers- 

The sound of large feet, clomping up the basement stairs drew near.         

- _and_ her boyfriend’s. 

 _Speaking of waking the dead_!

Bog, and Dawn’s husband, Sunny, came around the far corner leading off to the kitchen on the opposite end of the room.  The former carried a heavy flashlight and a pair of pliers; the latter, a handful of candles and a box of matches.

“Who wired this bloody ‘ouse, a fuckin’ _monkey_?”  Bog grouched, tossing the tools onto the sofa.  “I thought ye said ye ‘ad it _inspected_!”

“We _did_!”  Sunny timidly replied, immediately occupying himself with lighting and placing the candles around the room to avoid the much taller man’s notorious temper. 

“The inspector said something like this might happen, just because the house is over fifty years old.”  Dawn explained, a great deal braver than her spouse, when it came to dealing with Bog.  “We had so many other things to do, we…thought we’d just take care of it when we needed to.”

“Well, you can put it at the top of your list _now_.”  Marianne chuckled dryly, mouth full of noodles.

“Thank you for trying, Bog.”  Dawn beamed sweetly, ignoring her sister.  “We really appreciate it.”

“Yeah, well…jus’ gimme my kung pao before I ea’ yer husband like chicken nugget.”  Bog grumbled, not quite managing to hide his embarrassed flush at Dawn’s sisterly kindness.  “The little elf was drivin’ me up the _wall_ down in the basement.  Getting’ all underfoot trying tah find candles an’ matches while _I’m_ tryin’ tah _work_!”

“He’s _always_ underfoot, babe.”  Marianne snickered, popping open their complimentary cans of Pepsi.  “ _I’ve_ been trippin’ over him since middle school.”

“Hey, I got an idea.”  The _little elf_ piped up, blowing out the match he’d used to light the last candle.  “How about we all _stop_ pokin’ fun at my height and just _eat_?”

“I  _love_ your height, Sunny-Wunny.”  Dawn cooed, pressing a kiss to his cheek and handing him his box of sweet and sour pork. 

The other couple gagged and tossed a spring roll at them.  

* * *

“Well I’m fat and happy.”  Marianne declared an hour and a half later as Bog and Sunny swept the empty take-out containers back into the paper bags.  “What do we wanna do _now_?”

The squall outside hadn’t lessened one bit, so it had been decided that Bog and Marianne would be staying the night.  Thank goodness they had set up the guest bed in the spare room before the power went out! 

“How about a game?”  Dawn suggested, perking up like her namesake.  “Who’s up for Twister?”

“We haven’t unpacked it, honey.”  Her husband reminded her.  “It’s still in the van.”

“Besides,” Marianne added, “it’s no fun playing that with Bog.  He always wins ‘cause he’s so freakishly tall!”

“Hey, I can’nae help my genetics!”  

“Not so great bein’ teased about your height, is it?”  Sunny quipped only to shrink back from Bog’s answering growl. 

“Alright!”  Dawn chimed, hoping to prevent anymore picking on her poor husband.  “What about Cards Against Humanity?”

Sunny shook his head.

“Sill in the van.”

“Monopoly?”

“Van.”

“Clue?”

“Van.”

“Scrabble?”

“Get _real_ , sis.”

“Candyland?”

“Are ye bloody _daft_?”

“Life?”

“ _No_!”  Bog and Marianne flatly synced.

“Van, van and _van_.”

“Shoot.”  Dawn pouted for a moment, before her eyes lit up once more.  “Well, then how about Truth or Dare?”

“Ugh.”  Marianne groaned, leaning back against the front of the couch.  “Truth or Dare on a stormy night with no power.  Could this be any _more_ cliché?” 

“Yes,” Dawn jabbed, “Bog could be an axe murderer chasing us through the house.”

“Hmm,” Marianne nudged her boyfriend.  “Babe, I gotta a new roleplaying game for tomorrow night, but _I_ get to be the killer.”

“Gotta machete in the garage ye can use, luv.”

“Ew!  You two cut that out!”  Dawn squealed, dismayed that her joke had been turned into something so dirty. 

You’d think, with those two, she’d _know_ better by now.

“Seriously though, isn’t there _anything_ else we could play?”  Marianne asked.  “Truth or Dare is so _juvenile_.”

“I think yer jus’ scared.”

Apart from the howling wind beating against the house, the room was suddenly deathly silent.

Like a scene right out of The Exorcist, Marianne slowly turned her head in Bog’s direction. 

The timing of the lightning flash was _perfect_!

“ _What_ was that, stick man?” 

 _Uh oh!_   Dawn thought.  _Here they go again._

“Ye ‘eard me, I said I think yer _scared_.”

“Oh yeah?”  The brunette rose up on her knees, her competitive streak blazing in her honey-eyes.  “Alright, _Bug_.  I hope you’re still hungry after that kung pao, cuz I’m gonna shove yer giant foot all the way down yer throat!” 

“Ooooo, I’m _shakin’_!”  Bog spat with blatant sarcasm.  “Bring it _on_ , Tough Girl!”

“Oh for crying out loud!”  Dawn moaned.  “Can’t we _ever_ play _one_ game without you guys turning it into some kind of ultimate death match?”

Neither one acknowledged her question.  They were too immersed in their ‘ _you’re-going-down’_ staring contest. 

 _Apparently not_.

“Okay then, Bog, _you_ switch places with me, right _now_.”  Dawn ordered, trying to gain control of this now precarious situation.  “There is _no_ way I’m letting you sit next to each other, if we’re gonna do this.  All my furniture is brand new!” 

Without breaking eye-contact with his girlfriend, Bog slid around Dawn and took her place next to Sunny; directly across the table from Marianne.

Once everyone was situated, Dawn glanced back and forth between Bog and her sister.  Both had yet to stop glaring at each other.

…

…

…

“That’s it!”  She announced.  “I’m tweaking the rules!”

“It’s _Truth_ or _Dare_ , Dawn.” Marianne emphasized, finally turning to her sister.  “How can you _possibly_ tweak the rules?”

“Like this: you and Bog are _not_ allowed to ask each other Truth or Dare!”

She cringed at the following chorus of ‘What?’, ‘No way!’, ‘Come on!’ and ‘That sucks!’

“Look, it’s just so you two don’t break my new house or any bones!” She argued.  “I’ll make it as fair as I can.  We’ll go clockwise around the table.  When it’s mine or Sunny’s turn, _we_ only get to ask either one of _you_ Truth or Dare, and vice versa.  You also have to switch off between the two people you’re allowed to ask.  So if like, Bog chooses _Sunny_ on his _first_ turn, then he has to choose _me_ on his _second_.  Everybody got it?  Winner is whoever asks a Truth or Dare that gets forfeited.”

“Dawn, with _these_ two, we could be playin’ all night!”  Sunny complained. 

“Or fer only _five minutes_ , if one of ye _newlyweds_ does’nae wuss ou’ first.”

“Hey, we’re _not_ gonna _wuss_ out!”  Dawn snapped. 

“Oh _please_.  I once Dared you to stick your big toe in the toilet and you cried for an _hour_!” 

“That was in _third grade_ , Marianne, and it was so _not_ an _hour_!  It was _three_ minutes!  _Tops_!” 

“Who cares?”  Bog cut in.  “Les’ jus’ ge’ this started so _I_ can make _Marianne_ cry.”

“In your _dreams_ , twiggy!”

“OKAAAAAAAY!”  Dawn announced to begin the game _and_ drown out the opposing banter.  “ _I’ll_ be going first!  Bog, Truth or Dare?”

The man smirked at the fiery brunette in front of him.

“ _Dare_.”

“Big surprise there.”  Dawn muttered before tapping her chin in thought. 

Her sky-blue eyes scanned the shadowy room until they landed on her purse she’d left wedged between the arm of the couch and an end table.  Face splitting in a grin, she sunk a hand into it, rummaged around, and pulled out a tiny bottle.

A bottle of sparkly, hot _pink_ nail polish!

“Bog, I Dare you to-”

“Let ye pain’ my nails with tha’?  Psh, weak.”  He snorted, already presenting his long, bony hands to her. 

“Ah, ah, _ah_!”  Dawn playfully chided, shaking a finger at him.  “You didn’t let me _finish_.  I _Dare_ you to wear _this_ nail color for a _whole_ week!”

“ _Wha_ ’?!”  Bog snatched his hands back as if she’d burned him.  “We’ve go’ a _gig_ at the Moonlight Dome this Friday!”

He always kept his nails long, black and filed to claw-like points as part of a gimmick for his and Marianne’s rock band, _Wilderness_. 

“What’s the matter _Boggy_?”  Marianne jeered.  “You gonna forfeit on the _first_ round; to _Dawn_?” 

Bog ground his crooked teeth in irritation, before squaring his shoulders and sneering at her in defiance. 

“No’ a _chance_.”  He slammed his hands onto the table, a signal for Dawn to go ahead. 

The blonde untwisted the cap and got busy.  She was such an expert she wasn’t the least bit concerned about dripping any polish on her new coffee table.  Her current record for ten fingers was 7.8 minutes, not including drying time. 

“ _Your_ turn, Barbie doll.”  Marianne taunted.

Bog scowled at her. 

“Truth or Dare, Sunny?”

“Truth.” 

“Alrigh’…tell us who was the star o’ yer most embarrassin’ sex dream?”

Sunny’s ears went scarlet and his eyes darted in Dawn’s direction. 

His wife only gave him an innocently curious smile. 

“Oh _god_.”  He muttered, rubbing an agitated hand over his face.  “Um, uh…”

Marianne started quietly chanting ‘wuss’ to the Jeopardy theme.

Bog joined in.

“It’s okay, Sunny.”  Dawn encouraged, blowing on the already half-finished, wet nails of Bog’s right hand.  “Go ahead and tell us.  I won’t get mad.”

Her husband gulped and finally waved for silence. 

“Okay, okay…it was…i-it was…Plum.”

Three pairs of eyes widened cartoonishly at the man.

“ _Plum_?”  Bog repeated in disbelief and rising disgust.  “As in, Sharlene ‘Plum’ Fairchild?  YE ‘AD A _SEX_ DREAM ABOU’ MY _AUNT_?!”   

“You are such a _freak_!”  Marianne teased with glee, punching her brother-in-law in the arm. 

“When did this ‘appen?  No!  DORN’T answer tha’!  I _dorn’t_ wanna know!” 

Sunny gazed up at his wife. 

…

Well, she _didn’t_ seem _mad_.  Just… _disturbed_.

“So you think aunt Plum is hot?”

“ _No_ , Dawn!  _God_ , no!  You _know_ she drives me _crazy_!”

“Crazy with _lu-ust_!”  Marianne cackled. 

“NO!  I mean she’s _annoying_!  We all know how totally _nuts_ she is!”  

It was true, Bog’s paternal aunt was so eccentric, she made Cruella de Vil look like Ben Stein. 

“How often have you dreamt about her?”

“Just that _one_ time Dawn, I SWEAR!” 

She stared suspiciously at him before returning to her painting without another word. 

Sunny sighed and turned to Marianne.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Dare, lover boy."

"Cut it out, will ya?!  I Dare you to...to uh, um...man, I'm no good at these things!  I Dare you to...tear off a big piece of one of the bags and eat it."

Marianne rolled her eyes and quickly performed the amateur's task without so much as a hint of discomfort. 

“Yer go, Marianne.”  Bog grumbled, still eyeing Sunny as if he was a lecherous, oozing booger or something. 

“Truth or Dare, Dawn?”

“Truth.”

“Of _course_.  Same as Bog’s question to Sunny.”

“Oh, come _on_!”  Sunny cried.  “I don’t wanna hear about _that_!” 

“Well I _do_ , so _can_ it, Oedipus.”

“It was a _dream_ , and _Oedipus_ slept with his _mom_!” 

“Whatever.  Dawn, _spill_!”

Her sister didn’t pause in her task and she didn’t even blush as she responded.

“Bog.”

“ _WHAT_?!”

“ _WHA_ ’?!”

Bog’s left hand jerked in surprise and Dawn seized his wrist to hold him steady.

“Be _still_.”  She scolded, smoothing out the coat on his middle fingertip before addressing her husband with a shrug.  “Relax, Sunny.  It was back when these two were still dancing around their feelings for each other.  I thought Bog’s whole bad-boy thing was kinda hot, for a while.  It was no big deal.”

Bog squirmed uncomfortably at her nonchalance and Sunny just looked green. 

“Man, I was hoping she’d get all flustered but…can’t say I blame her taste in _men_.”  

Marianne winked at her boyfriend which he returned with a disgruntled frown despite the redness dusting his sharp cheekbones.

“You’re up, Dawn,” she continued, challengingly holding his eyes, “and I pick Dare.”

“One sec…almost…bit more there…aaaaaaaand _done_!  C’est magnifique!  Oh, _darn_ it, I wish I’d _timed_ this!  That felt like _six_ minutes!” 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 200+ hits on Take My Hand, so time for some more Truth or Dare!
> 
> Hope you guys like it!

While Bog stared at his glittering nails like a kid that had dropped his ice cream cone in the street, Dawn shifted her attention to her sister and drummed her fingers as she tried to think of a good Dare. 

She had gotten lucky with Bog.  She really _hadn’t_ meant to have him wear the nail polish for a whole week, but his arrogant foresight had made her determined to knock him down a peg. 

But Marianne was a considerably tougher nut to crack.  She was just as Dare-crazy as Bog, and Dawn was _not_ devious by nature.  

Too _strong_ a Dare, and she’d feel like she was being mean, and there was _no_ way she was going to Dare _either_ of them to do anything disgusting or physically dangerous.  

Too _weak_ a Dare, and she would probably lose the game and suffer the endless teasing that she was apparently still as brave as she was in third grade.  

What to do?! 

Fortunately, she didn’t have to worry long, for the gloriously simple answer came in the nick of time.  

At its core, this _was_ a battle of wills between Bog and Marianne, and if Dawn played her cards right and pitted them _against_ each other, without letting them directly retaliate, _maybe_ she and Sunny would stand a chance! 

And there was only _one_ way to pit those two against each other _without_ resorting to _violence_.  For all their big-talk, it was a renowned fact that, underneath it all, they were the most ridiculous head-over-heels-in-love dorks on the planet, but public admission and/or displays of affection were their kryptonite. 

As well as _anything_ from their past that would challenge their current punk reputation, and as Marianne’s sister, she’d witnessed _firsthand_ all of her _humiliating_ phases growing up. 

Ah- _ha_!  She inwardly grinned at her, now replenished, Truth or Dare ammo.      

Hiding her glee, Dawn stood up and marched over to a random stack of boxes in the corner and started rummaging through the contents of the open one at the top.  Making sure no one could see what she was doing, she carefully extracted her weapon from a flower-patterned booklet inside and pressed it to her chest as she casually returned to her spot at the coffee table. 

Bog was in for a real treat! 

“I Dare _you_ to show _your_ boyfriend _this_!”  

She tilted the 3”x5” photo just enough for her sister to see the image on its front. 

Marianne’s face when from white with horror to red with rage in the span of three seconds. 

“You-!  You told me you _burned_ all of those!” 

“Burned wha’?!”  Bog asked, curiosity beyond piqued as he forgot all about his nails and tried to make a grab for the photo.  “Lemme see!  Lemme see!” 

“I _lied_.”  Dawn jeered, avoiding his hands.  “Do you accept the Dare, or do you forfeit?”  

Marianne snarled at her, but snatched up the picture. 

“You are _so_ dead.”  She promised her sister as she reluctantly surrendered the photo to a more than eagerly awaiting Bog.  

Her boyfriend took one look at the picture and immediately howled with laughter. 

“YE WERE A FAN O’ _LANA LIZARD_?!” 

He turned the photo around so everyone could see the image of a seven-year-old Marianne with a Tootsie Roll Pop in her mouth and wearing a Lana Lizard Halloween costume, complete with Lana’s signature blue birthmark around the mask’s left eye-hole.  

“Oh she was _more_ than a fan!”  Dawn added.  “She was _obsessed_!” 

“ _Dawn_!” 

“Oh yeah, I remember!”  Sunny joined.  “She made your mom tape all the episodes, she had all the toys and the CDs and the toothbrush and bed set-” 

“Shut _up_ , Sunny!” 

“Remember the old coin-operated Lana Lizard ride at the Central Market?  She used to bawl like a baby if mom and dad didn’t let her ride it every time we went in and out of that store!” 

Bog was rolling on the floor by now with tears streaming down his cheeks. 

“Dawn, I will _hit_ you with your own _husband_!” 

“Why don’t you just use your _boyfriend_?  He already looks like a hockey stick!” 

The _hockey stick_ finally managed to gulp some air and calm down.  

“Well,” he gasped as he wiped at the wetness in his eyes with the heel of his hand, “ _now_ I know why _this_ excites ye so much!”

He stuck his tongue out at Marianne, like Gene Simmons, and wriggled it around in a _very_ lewd manner. 

“Oh _fuck_ you, Bog!”  His girlfriend shouted, kicking his shin under the table and snatching the picture back so she could rip it to shreds.  “You’re a sick _bastard_ , you know that?  I was _seven_!  Let’s just move on!  It’s _your_ turn and if you say _one_ more word to me about _anything_ relating to lizards, I’ll break your nose _again_!  _Got it_?!” 

“Fine, wha’ever!  Truth or Dare, Dawn?” 

“Truth.” 

“Chicken noodle.”  Her sister grumbled. 

“Wha’s the most ridiculous thing Sunny’s ever done tah ge’ ye in bed?” 

Dawn’s spouse went pale and Marianne shrieked in disgust. 

“BOG!  WHAT THE _HELL_?!” 

“Wha’?” 

“Hello?!  Little _sister_?!” 

“So?” 

“ _SO_ , I don’t wanna hear about her doing stuff like _that_!” 

“Yer the one tha’ asked ‘er abou’ a sex dream!” 

“Exactly!  A harmless _dream_!  As in, _not real_!  And I didn’t ask for any sordid _details_!”  

“Wha’ sordid details?  I’m askin’ abou’ the _lead_ up, no’ the act _itself_!”

“Thou shalt not taint the image of my baby sister!” 

“Oh calm your tits, Marianne!”  Dawn cut in.  “I’m twenty-five years old and _married_!  I can have as much sex as I want.  Heck, most major religions _expect_ it, so you can stop making up commandments.” 

Marianne dramatically whimpered like a kicked dog. 

“My little sister said ‘tits’!” 

“It was actually very cute.”  Dawn said, turning to Bog, but reaching back to pat Marianne on the head like a child.  “I was having a really bad day at work-” 

“Dawn, honey, _please_ don’t!”    

“-and when I got back to the apartment, he did a strip tease to Three Little Birds for me.” 

“Great.”  Marianne groaned as Bog chortled and clapped a blushing Sunny on the back.  “Now that song’s _ruined_ for me.” 

“Oh ye did’nae like Bob Marley anyway.”  

“Somebody kill me.” 

“Don’t be embarrassed Sunny-Wunny!  I thought it was very sweet and besides, it worked didn’t it?  Remember how I was so turned on I-?” 

“NO!”  Marianne yelped, throwing her hands in the air.  “Nonono!  This Truth is _over_ and I _forbid_ anyone from asking anymore about it!” 

“Oh sure, but when you and Bog wanna talk about goin’ at it like rabbits in heat, that’s supposed to be A-okay!” 

“Yes, it is.  I’m older, it’s the law of the universe and you can look it up later.  It’s your turn, Sunny!” 

Her brother-in-law sighed. 

“Bog, Truth or-” 

“Dare.” 

“Dammit, I don’t know what to-!” 

“Ooo!  Ooo!  Sunny, I’ve got an idea!”  

Dawn stretched over the table and motioned for him to do the same.  Once he was in position, she whispered something in his ear with a giggle.   

When Sunny leaned back, he scratched his neck, but there was an irrepressible spark in his golden-brown orbs. 

“Bog, what’s your _real_ name?” 

The band leader choked on air and his eyes popped open in shock, but everyone jumped at the sound of Marianne squeaking in excitement and latching onto the table’s edge.  

“What’s with _you_?”  Dawn asked before gasping in alarm.  “ _Wait_ a minute!  Do _you_ not even know it?!”    

“You kidding?!  It’s his most heavily guarded secret!  He changed it on his birth certificate, his driver’s license, he’s even sworn _Griselda_ to secrecy!” 

“Whoa.”  Sunny breathed as his wife shamelessly gaped.  

Getting Bog’s _mom_ to stay silent about _anything_ was _huge_! 

“Soooooooo,” Marianne drawled as she quirked a coy eyebrow at her sweating boyfriend, “what _is_ it, Bog?” 

“I-I-I picked _Dare_!” 

“Fine,” Sunny shrugged, “I _Dare_ you to tell us your real name!” 

Bog fisted his hands and growled like a bear, but eventually had no choice but to curse, bow his head and mumble. 

“What was that, Boggy?” 

“It’s…*mutter-mutter*.” 

“Huh?  We can’t hear you, man.” 

“I _said_ it’s…it’s…” 

“God _dammit_ , Bog!  Spit it out!” 

“IT’S _BOGARDUS_!” 

…

“Bo-gar-dus?”  Marianne repeated, sounding it out and tilting her head in both amusement _and_ amazed disbelief.

Sunny and Dawn snorted and snickered like a pair of imps.    

“Yes, Bogardus.  My real firs’ name is Bogardus.  Are ye all happy now?!”

“Bogardus!  It sounds like a crotchety old man!  Fits you perfect!”

“Bite me, ye midget!  I’m only thirty-three!” 

“It _is_ a crotchety old man!”  Dawn squealed.  “That’s the same name that guy had in The Bells of St. Mary’s, remember?”

“Alright, alright.”  Marianne called to order with a wave of her hand.  “It’s not _that_ bad.”

“Marianne, I swear if ye-”

“No, I _mean_ it.  It’s _not_ that bad!  Honestly, I’m amazed you’re _that_ sensitive about it.  Yeah it’s _unusual_ , but I really like the foreign quality.  I actually think it’s kinda…sexy.”

“Ugh.  You _would_!”  Dawn groaned, missing the touched and soon, _lusty_ look in Bog’s eyes as he gazed at her sister.  “Just take your turn, you teleiophile.”    

“Now _there_ ’ _s_ a vocabulary word for the day!”  Marianne chuckled before fixing Dawn with a mischievous demon’s glare.  “ _Truth_ or _Dare_ , little sis.”

“You’re supposed to ask _Sunny_.  You did me _last_ time.”

“So I’ll ask him on the next two rounds.  _Pick_ your _poison_.”

Dawn bit her lip.  It was clear that Marianne had nothing but revenge on her mind for earlier, so her initial impulse was to pick Truth…but if she did, she would only be doing it to try and play the game safe…just like a _wuss_.

“Dare!”

She saw Marianne’s eyes glint with momentary surprise, but it was gone as quickly as it came and replaced with a dark grin.

“I Dare _you_ to go into the bathroom and, _this_ time, stick _both_ of your _hands_ in the toilet for _thirty_ seconds!”

Dawn’s stomach lurched and her jaw dropped in shock.  She could hear Bog ‘oooing’ and Sunny making a muffled noise of both sympathy _and_ revulsion.

“Bog, you go in there with her and make sure she does it right!”

“As ye wish, princess!”  Her boyfriend leapt to his feet and extended a hand to Dawn.  “Le’s go tah the crapper, shall we?”

The blonde uttered a pitiful whine and Bog almost had to drag her trembling form out of the living room and down the hall.    

Marianne and Sunny waited in the shadowy silence.

…

…

…

…

"SHE’S DOIN’ IT!!!"

Dawn’s anguished wail came pouring through the house. 

“THIRTY, TWENTY NINE, TWENTY EIGHT, TWENTY SEVEN-!”

Marianne doubled over cackling and pounded the table. 

“-TWENTY TWO, TWENTY ONE, TWENTY, NINETEEN-!”

“Marianne, don’t ya think this is a bit extreme?”

“-FOURTEEN, THIRTEEN, TWELVE, ELEVEN-!”

“Hey, she _wanted_ a Dare, so I gave her one!  Besides, she _deserves_ it for lying to me about that photo!”

“-FIVE-FOUR-THREE-TWO- _ONE_!!!” 

Bog came bounding back into the room sniggering like crazy.

“Holy _shit_ !  I can’nae believe _she_ just _did_ tha’!  Tha’ was fuckin’ _hilarious_ !  Yer a mad genius, Tough Girl!  Oh yeah, Sunny, ye migh’ wanna go in there, she’s a wee bi’ _insane_ righ’ now!”

Bog and Marianne practically fell over each other from laughing so hard.  

“You guys suck.”  Sunny grouched as he stood up and headed for the bathroom.  “Hold on, Dawn!  I’m comin’!”

He found his wife sniffing back tears and standing at the sink, scrubbing soapy water over her hands as if she was possessed.

“Grossgrossgrossgrossgross!”

“Yeah, that was real nasty,” Sunny said, retrieving a big bottle of antibacterial hand sanitizer they kept in the medicine cabinet, “but you did it and I’m _proud_ of you, baby.”

Five more furious wash cycles later, and Dawn finally sat down on the toilet and let Sunny rub the cherry-scented sanitizer from her fingertips all the way to her elbows. 

They could still hear Bog and Marianne guffawing in the other room like idiots. 

“She’s not gonna get away with this.”  Dawn promised, scrunching her face with pouting determination. 

“You _wanted_ to play, sweetheart.  You know how intense your sister and Bog can get over this kinda stuff.  It’s best to just stick to Truth until they get bored.”

“No!  No, that’s _just_ what they _expect_ us to do, because they think we can’t _handle_ it!”

“Uh, that’s cuz we _can't_  , Dawn.  _We'_ _re_ not totally _nuts_!” 

“This isn’t a competition between _them_ and _us_.  It’s between the two of _them_!”

“Huh?  What are you talkin’ about?”

“I’ve got a plan.”

“A plan?”

“They’ve both got the same weakness and I know how we can exploit it!”

“Okay, now _you’re_ startin’ to scare me.”

“We can beat them with the Truth!”

“Truth?  We’ll never win that way!  They _always_ pick _Dare_!”

“Right!  So we’ll just do what _you_ did before…we’ll _Dare_ them to tell the _Truth_!”

“I…I don’t get it.”

Dawn just smirked like the Grinch at her wonderful, _awful_ idea. 

“Just follow my lead.”  

* * *

“You all better now, sugar pie?”  Marianne cooed as the married couple finally returned to the living room.  

“Just fine.”  Dawn beamed, settling back down on her pillow-seat.  “Let’s see, it’s _my_ turn again isn’t it?  And I have to ask Bog, don’t I?”

“Uh, yeah.”

Both the brunette and her boyfriend were a bit unsettled at the show of nonchalance. 

“Marianne, may I borrow you phone?”

“What for?”

“I wanna play Candy Crush.”

“We’re playing Truth or Dare!”

“I know, I can multitask.”

“What’s wrong with _your_ phone?”

“It’s dead.”

“I don’t have Candy Crush, I have Fruit Ninja.”

“That’s fine.”

“…I don’t trust you.”

“Oh jus’ give ‘er the phone and be done with it!”  Bog spat.  “It’s no’ like she’s got the guts tah do anythin’ to it with ye sittin’ right next to ‘er!” 

Ultimately, Marianne hesitantly surrendered the device, but she only visibly relaxed once she heard the familiar music cue up. 

“Okie-dokie, Boggy-Woggy!”

“Ye know I hate when ye call me tha’!”

“Truth or Dare?”

“Dare.”

Hidden behind the phone, Dawn’s smile was pure, adorable evil.

“ _Excellent_.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you gusy enjoyed it! Dawn's about to get freaky! 
> 
> Leave a kudos or a comment either here or on my blog! I LOVE talking to you <3
> 
> 200+ hits and I'll post another story/chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally finished with chapter 3! Not particlarly proud of it, but it's building up for some more stuff in the next chapter(s) and we do get to see some more of how silly and competitive Bog and Marianne's relationship is! 
> 
> Anyway, I have some credits to give out:  
> To the-lady-princess-of-gallifrey for her Truth prompt.  
> To lilmissrantsypants, gotta-strange-magic-therpg, elaboratelunatic, and anonymous for their playlist prompts.
> 
> If I didn't use your song suggestion, it's not becasue I didn't like it (trust, me it was a VERY hard to choose), I just had to narrow it down to my favorites and pick those that I thought fit their personalities in this particular AU.

Dawn brushed a few crumbs off the table before giving her full attention to Bog.  There was an eerily calm gleam in her sparkling blue eyes. 

“Before I give you your Dare, Bog, I need to establish a little context.” 

“Uh…okay?” 

“I’m sure you’re well aware that Daddy used to hate you.” 

“ _Used_ to?” 

The interior designer rolled her eyes. 

“He likes you just _fine_ now.  You still scare him, sometimes, but he’s gotten used to you, for the most part.”  

“It’s true, babe.” 

“Alrigh’, so wha'?” 

“Anyway, the main reason he disliked you _before_ , was because there used to be a pretty nasty rumor floating around about you.” 

Confused, Bog glanced at Marianne, but for once, her expression was indecipherable.    

Dawn carded her fingers and rested her chin over them like a Bond villain. 

“People were saying that you beat up an old man.” 

“ _Wha'_?!” 

“I heard that your face was so scary,” Sunny added, “he died of a heart attack!”  

Marianne pitifully covered a snort of laughter with a short coughing fit. 

“Tha’s _ridiculous_!” 

“I was hoping you’d say that!”  Dawn smiled darkly.  “I _Dare_ you to tell us the _truth_ behind your so-called ‘evil’ reputation!  What’s the _real_ reason why nobody, except my sister, messes with you?” 

Bog's lip curled up in an irritated snarl and his frustrated exhale came out in a hiss.  

“The ol’ man yer referrin’ to, was jus’ some guy I rear-ended my junior year o' high school.  He go’ out of his car first an' was yellin’ an’ cussin’.  But once I stepped out an’ he saw me, he tripped backwards over the curb an’ fell on the sidewalk.” 

Sunny’s brown eyes were saucer-wide. 

“Did he _die_?”   

“ _No_!”  Bog frowned.  “He go’ a _concussion_.  I drove him tah the hospital.  He paid for the damage on both cars tah thank me, then he retired an’ moved tah Arizona a month later” 

“Aww!”  Dawn cooed.  “How _sweet_!” 

“Never knew you were such a Good Samaritan!  My image of you is totally blown!” 

 Bog growled at the younger man but was quickly distracted my Marianne’s snickering. 

“So your whole ‘evil’ reputation really _is_ just your scary face!” She teased.  “And here I thought you were an actual badass!”  

“Ah, shut up ye damn fairy!” 

“Make me, you praying mantis!” 

“Children, children!”  Dawn called to order.  “Let’s just move along, shall we?  Go ahead, Bog.” 

He glared at the brunette for a beat, but shifted to address Sunny. 

“Truth or Dare?” 

Feeling brave thanks to the first successful implementation of his wife’s scheme, Sunny decided to select Dare.  A choice he would deeply regret once Bog told him to lick the wood floor like a dog for one full minute.  When it was over, the poor guy couldn’t stop gagging long enough to clearly voice his turn, not that it mattered much, since Marianne just cackled out Dare. 

“Text me the Dare, Sunny.”  Dawn said nodding to her sister’s phone and being the only one taking pity on his disgusted suffering.  “I’ll read it out loud for you.” 

Sunny whipped out his cell, trying not to panic. 

 _-I don’t know what 2 do!  What’s a good Dare 4 her?-_

Instead of replying, Dawn raised her head and, smooth as silk, made up one. 

“Marianne, Sunny Dares you to tell us every song that’s on your ‘Sweet Bog Luvin’ playlist.” 

“My _WHAT_?!” 

“Yeah,” Dawn shrugged.  “When I borrowed your I-pod to go to the gym last week, I noticed the playlist name just before I gave it back to you, but I never got a chance to check it out.  Of course, I told Sunny all about it and we’ve been ridiculously curious ever since.  Looks like now’s the best opportunity to find out!  Good Dare, baby!” 

Caught up in his wife’s ploy and finally over his nausea, Sunny winked at her and faced Marianne head on. 

“So, Marianne, what’s on that playlist?” 

Honest to God, his sister-in-law looked like she was beginning to sweat bullets.  She even fixed her frantic eyes on Bog for a silent and useless plea for help.  

“Dorn’t look at _me_!”  The equally blushing man griped.  “I told ye a _thousand_ times tha’ ye should burn it on a CD, remember?!” 

Marianne ground her teeth and ducked her head as she mumbled: 

“First is _Strange Magic_ by E.L.O.  Second is _Wild is the Wind_ by David Bowie.  Third is _You Take My Heart Away_ by Deetta Little and Nelson Pigford.  Fourth is-” 

“Wait!”  Dawn cut in.  “Where’s that third one from?” 

“It’s the…… _love_ theme from…Rocky.” 

“Ah-ha!”  Her sister exclaimed.  “I _knew_ you two liked that movie for more than the _boxing_!” 

“That’s so cuuuuuuuute!”  Sunny sang. 

“You both suck!”  Marianne snapped, before continuing.  “Fourth is _Waiting for a Girl like You_ , _Is This Love_ by Whitesnake, _Shut Up and Dance With Me_ by Walk the Moon, _New Obsession_ by Carly M. Burns, _And I Love Her_ by the Beatles, _Until the End_ by Quietdrive.” 

Bog’s head thunked against the table. 

“ _Something About Us_ by Daft Punk, _Kiss You All Over_ by Exile………….”

“Go on, sister dear!” 

“Goddammit.  _Somewhere in the Night_ by……by……shit……Barry M-Manilow.” 

“BARRY-!”  Sunny spluttered.  “BARRY MANILOW?!” 

Bog made a muffled whining sound and Marianne’s face bloomed bright red.  

Dawn smirked like a fat cat. 

“I’m not surprised.” 

“You’re _not_?!  Really?!”  Sunny demanded.  “Barry Manilow?!  _These_ two?!”    

“Nope.  Mom and Dad loved Manilow.  They listened to him all the time when Marianne and I were kids, so it doesn’t shock me that something stuck.”  Dawn said before baby-talking Bog and her sister.  “Just couldn’t wesist his pwecious womantic cwooning, sweeties?” 

The rock band mates refused to meet anyone’s eyes for a long minute while they cursed Dawn, Sunny and all their future offspring under their breaths.  During the break, Sunny couldn’t resist shooting off a congratulatory text to his clever wife.     

 _-Good 1!  Thnx <3 Btw, what r u gonna do with her phone?-_

_-W8 and see ;)-_

“Truth or Dare, _Sunny_.”  Marianne hissed with a vengeful glint in her eye. 

“Truth.” 

She growled at his safety net and drummed her fingers on the coffee table as she tried to come up with something horrendous. 

“I go’ an idea, babe.”  Bog said, crooking a finger at her. 

Marianne leaned over the table as Bog whispered something into her ear until her face lit up like the Fourth of July.  

“Okay, Sunny.”  She said, leaning back.  “I’ll give you a Truth.  Since we all know you were crushing on Dawn _yeeeeeaaaaars_ before you actually made a move, what was the creepiest thing you did while you were _pining_ away?” 

Sunny’s face drained of color and his knees bumped against the table leg. 

“Ooo!”  Dawn gushed, clapping her hands together in excitement.  “I _actually_ really wanna hear _this_!” 

“ _Dawn_!”  Her husband whined, tugging his red bandanna in agitation. 

“Come on, Sunny!”  Marianne prodded.  “Regale us with the pinnacle tale of your stalker days.” 

“I wasn’t a stalker!” 

“Don’t listen to her, Sunny-Wunny!  Just tell us-” 

“The mos’ pathetic moment o’ yer crush.” 

“Boggy!  Don’t be mean!” 

“The game’s boring as hell if yer not!” 

“That’s not true!  You and Marianne are just-!” 

The elder sibling snapped her fingers at the bickering pair. 

“You two, hush up!”  She stabbed finger at Sunny’s grimaced face.  “You, talk!” 

Shoulders slumping, the brother in law groaned and confessed: 

“I guess it was at our senior prom.  I’d been trying to get Hadrian to ask Dawn to the dance for the past month, cuz I thought she liked him, but then she said she had a crush on Nathan, so I got him to ask her instead.” 

Dawn cupped her cheeks. 

“My sweet little matchmaker!” 

“Yeah well, at the prom, I didn’t dance or anything.  I sat outside the gym doors and watched Dawn dance with pretty much every guy in school.”    

“Wanna know a secret, sweetheart?  I didn’t really like Nathan either.” 

“You _what_?!” 

“The only reason I said I did was because I’d figured out that I really liked _you_ and……I wanted to make you jealous.” 

“I-you-what?!  Man, I hated _both_ those guys!” 

“Feel like a jackass, yet?”  Marianne snorted, before quirking an eyebrow at her sister.  “Seriously though, Dawn, why would you think that would work?  Sunny was your best friend since Pre-K.  He endured and supported you in the great whirlwind crush storm of the seventh grade.  How was he supposed to suddenly get jealous after all that?  The magic of prom night?”  

“I was _eighteen_ and just as stupid as everyone else, so shut it.”  Dawn huffed.  “Besides, we got together later that summer before college anyway.” 

“Yech!”  Her sister mock-retched.  “Don’t remind me!  Those were dark, nauseating days!” 

“How bad was it, luv?” 

Marianne shuddered. 

“So…much…nuzzling.  So…many…pet names.” 

“Good times, huh, Rainbow-Sugar-Bird?”   

“You know it, Sunshine-Honey-Lamb chop!”      

“AH!  STOP IT!”  Marianne shouted as the couple leaned over the table to Eskimo Kiss.  “YOU TWO CUT IT OUT, OR I’LL SPRAY YOU WITH WINDEX!” 

“Bad married people!”  Bog scolded, lightly swatting them with his chopsticks.  “Bad!”  

Giggling, Sunny and Dawn sat back and the latter nonchalantly examined her nails as she spoke to her sister.  

“Can’t handle the fluff, Marianne?  We’ll see about _that_ ; Truth or Dare?” 

“Dar-!  Um…,” she faltered, suddenly wary, “….Dare?” 

“Of course we all know how you _met_ Bog, but I Dare you to tell me _exactly_ why I came over to your apartment only _four days_ later and saw you two screwing like animals on the kitchen table!”  

Bog spewed out his Pepsi and nearly hacked up a lung as Marianne’s face froze in mortification.  

“Oh my God, you-you-you _SAW_ us?!”

“Heck yeah, she did.”  Sunny said, thumping Bog on the back to help clear his airway.  “She was so traumatized, she couldn’t sleep for a week.” 

“So do tell, Marianne.  How did you guys go from brawling to boning in such a short amount of time?  I _don’t_ need all the gory details, but I just want to know what specifically flipped your attraction switch.” 

“Attraction switch?” 

“You know what I mean.  You gonna forfeit or what?” 

“Rrrrr, fuck......it was……after the cops had taken us downtown.  I was upset about being arrested and……there were all these other people in the cell and they kept……crying and carrying on and it was so _loud_ I had to…block my ears so……Bog yelled at them to be quiet.” 

“…” 

“…” 

“…” 

“That’s it?”  Dawn blinked.  “That’s what got you to start liking him?  You two were total strangers trying to beat the hell out of each other that night, but all it took was him shouting at everybody in the jail to make him…sexy?” 

“No!  It’s because he……he only did it to……make me feel better.  He saw how uncomfortable I was, and……even after our fight……he…still…” 

Her explanation was cut off once she noticed the complete shit-eating grin Bog was giving her.  Her shy expression instantly morphed into a scowl.      

“Bog, _stop_ staring at me.”

“So ye were so turned on by my chivalry, ye gave me yer number!” 

“That is _not_ what I said, you-!” 

“ _I_ though’ it was cuz I won the fight.” 

“Psh, as _if_!  _I_ won; I _totally_ kicked your ass!” 

“And then I shagged _yers_ less than a week later.” 

“Please!  If anything, _I_ was the dominant one!  You were too much of a pansy to make a fucking move!” 

“Yeah right!  I suppose tha’s why I was on top _every_ time?  I remember tha’ day a’ yer apartment.  We christened _way_ more than tha’ kitchen table, didn’t we, Tough Girl?” 

“Um, guys?  Woo-oo!  T.M.I. over here!” 

But Dawn’s waving distress call went unheeded.  

“I hate you.” 

“I hate ye _more_.” 

“I hate you with all my heart.” 

“I hate ye with all my soul.” 

“I wanna make hate to you all night long.” 

“I hate ye so much, I’d marry ye!” 

“I hate you so much, I’d say yes!” 

“I wanna have a hate-child with ye!” 

“I wanna have a hate-grandchild with you!” 

“WHAT ON _EARTH_ IS _WRONG_ WITH YOU TWO?!” 

Dawn’s neck was aching from looking back and forth between them as if she’d been watching a demented tennis match.  Neither party so much as flinched at her outburst, but they _were_ glowering at each other with an all-too-familiar hint of lust.  

“I’m confused.”  Sunny said partly to himself, scratching the back of his head.  “Were they serious?  Are they engaged now or broken up or what?” 

“If we’re quite finished with this strange mating ritual of the criminally, bat-shit insane,” Dawn resumed, ignoring her husband’s question, “I’d like to continue the game now, please?” 

When she received no reply, she elbowed Bog and went back to fiddling with Marianne’s phone. 

“Bog, it’s your turn and I choose Dare.” 

“Ye know ye don’t stand a chance, _princess_.”  The Scotsman promised, keeping his gaze locked on his girlfriend.  

“I’m just getting warmed up, _goblin_.”  She sneered back.  “I’ll break you one way or another.” 

The blonde bit her lip to silence her squeal of wicked glee.  Everything was going according to plan.  She surreptitiously pressed one last button on Marianne’s cell and then set it down in her lap.  

_Time to take it up a notch!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked it! More hijinks to come. Just what is Dawn planning to do?! XD  
> Leave me a comment or kudos for a faster update! <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At long last, this story is continuing. Not sure if it's as good as the rest, but either way, it's here.  
> Credit to humanityinahandbag for her Truth prompt! We miss you, girl! <3
> 
> Enjoy and warning: EVIL DAWN AHEAD!
> 
> By the way, see if you can spot the other Alan Cumming movie reference I put in!

Bog stared at Dawn’s eagerly beaming face, but just scratched the back of his head with a reluctant grimace. 

“Eh……I Dare ye tah….um……I dunno, cluck like a chicken.”

“Huh?  What kind of lame Dare is _that_?”

“Yeah, seriously, Bog.”  Marianne snorted.  “It’s totally _weak_!”

“I can’t give _her_ a _good_ Dare!  It’d be like kickin’ a puppy!”

“ _Excuse_ me?!”

“What?”

“Ye always say she’s a textbook ‘goody-two-shoes’, and ye jus’ made ‘er stick ‘er ‘ands in the toilet!  She’s ‘ad enough.” 

“Hey, that’s not fair!  I’ve been doing great in this game!  You can’t just decide what I can and can’t handle!  And what do you mean ‘textbook definition of a goody-two-shoes’?!”

“ _She_ said i’, no’ me.”

“Gimme a _good_ Dare, Boggy!”

“No; an’ it’s ‘ _Bog_ ’!”

“I WANT A GOOD DARE!”

“ALRIGHT!  Alright already!  I Dare ye tah……tah go upstairs tah thah attic an’ no’ turn on the light fer……five minutes.”

All of Dawn’s bravado seemed to evaporate into thin air and her head turned slowly in the direction of the hallway, where the drop ladder to the attic was.

“Now hold on a minute!”  Sunny said.  “That’s too much!  I haven’t checked the attic for safety yet.  I don’t want you to go up there Dawn.”

“Then just have her sit on the floor right on top of the ladder.”  Marianne suggested.  “It’s too late to take back the Dare.  She asked for a good one.  If she won’t do it, then she loses the game.”

Bog stood and walked over to the living room’s archway leading to the shadowy hall.  He drummed his fingers impatiently against the wall and glanced over his shoulder at the blonde.  

“What’s it gonna be, Tinker Bell?” 

The homeowner in question took a moment before she pocketed Marianne’s phone, slowly rose on shaky legs, and dragged her feet across the room to the hallway.  Her periwinkle blue eyes were as wide as saucers as she peered around the corner and up into the darkness at the deceptively innocent cord dangling from the attic door.  Bog reached up and tugged it down, dropping the attic door open and revealing the gaping maw of blackness above.  The ladder slid out like a tongue, inviting Dawn into the mouth of a monster.

Bog could hear the sound of her gulping as she climbed up the ladder and disappeared into the blackness while he left the hall.

~

_5 minutes later_

_~_

“Okay, Dawn!  You can-!”

“EEEEEEEEYYYYYYYAAAAAA!!!  _SPIDERS_!  SPIDERS!  GET’EMOFFMEGET’EMOFFMEGET’EMOFFME!!!”

Dawn came clattering down the ladder and sprinting into the living room, swatting at her hair and clothes like they were on fire.

“Dawn!”  Sunny cried, scrambling to his feet and grabbing at her arms to calm her.  “Dawn, honey!  Hey, hey, hey!  It’s okay!  You’re alright!  There’re no spiders!” 

“You guys are so mean!”  She pouted, plopping back down on the floor with a huff while Bog and Marianne dissolved into a fit of hysterics.

“Yeah!” Her husband agreed, finally getting into the spirit of things.  “Now you’re gonna get it!”

“Oh yeah?”  Bog grinned, wiping a merry tear from his eye.  “Go ahead, elf-man.  Gimme yer best shot.  Dare me!”

Sunny glared at the smug Scotsman as he mentally scrambled to think of a real good Dare; one that would take Bog down a few pegs, and hopefully Marianne too.  He flashed a look to his wife, but she was too busy glaring daggers at her sister, no doubt picturing whatever horrible revenge she had planned for later in the game.  He still wondered what she was up to, but now was not the time to dwell on it.

_What would Dawn do?_

_What would Dawn do?_

_WWDW?_

_WWDW?_

!!!

“I Dare you to tell me……if you’ve ever…woken up early in the morning…and watched Marianne sleeping because she just looked so utterly beautiful, you just couldn’t bear to wake her!”

“…”

“…”

“Say _wha’_?”

“You heard him, Boggy-bear!” Dawn giggled, gleaming with pride for her husband.  “What does my sister look like in the golden morning light?”

“Like a Chinese Crested.”

“Kiss my ass, you douche!” 

“Come on, answer the question!”  Sunny prodded.  “Have you ever watched Marianne while she’s sleeping?” 

 “Yeah, Bog.”  Her sister smirked, enjoying watching her boyfriend squirm.  “Do you get all Edward Cullen-y on me sometimes?”

Bog ducked his flushing head.

“……Maybe.”

“You _creeper_!”  Marianne cackled.

“Shu’ up!”

“ _Creepy_ creeper!” 

Only Dawn noticed the flattered blush on her sister’s cheeks. 

“Oh please, Marianne!  You know you think it’s sweet!  I bet the first thing you do when you wake up is give him a great, big kiss!”

“Hmph!”  Marianne scoffed, crossing her arms and turning her nose up.  “I’d rather kiss a Wookie.”

“ _Tha’_ can be arranged!”

“Ah-ah-ah!”  Dawn exclaimed, clapping her hands like a teacher calling her class to order.  “No Star Trek quotes!”

“Star _Wars_!”  Everyone yelled.

“Whatever!  Can we just move along, please?”

“I pick Truth, Marianne.”  Sunny said.

“Okay, Sunny, tell us…….the scariest moment of your life.”

“When I met Bog.”  

“Gee, thanks, ye little turd.”

“You can hardly blame me!  You said you were gonna throw me through a window!”

“Dorn’t exaggerate, I said I was gonna throw ye through the _wall_ fer bein’ such a klutz.” 

“It doesn’t make any difference!  You were acting like a complete psycho!”

“I’ll admi’ I was drunk, but ye know what?  I’m _still_ pissed tha’ ye ruined my vintage Stones shirt with tha’ silly, frou-frou drink o’ yers!  Tha’ was my dad’s!” 

The valuable Stones shirt Bog was referring to, met its end the night he first met Sunny, Dawn and Marianne four years ago.  It was Dawn’s twenty-first birthday, and the trio had gone out to celebrate, as well as try to perk up Marianne.  She’d caught her ex-fiancé, Roland, cheating on her the day before the wedding and had really needed to go out and get shit-faced. 

To lighten things up and as a special treat, Sunny had ordered a Love Potion for Dawn.  It was a sparkly pink cocktail that was very popular among the local, younger crowd.  It also stained like fucking ink!  Bog had been shooting pool and when Sunny had walked by with the drink in hand, he accidentally tripped over a cue and splattered the gaudy liquid all over the lanky Scotsman.  Bog had also been at the bar (which his Aunt Plum owned), to drink and shoot his heartbroken troubles away so his reaction to the spill could certainly be labeled as overly-dramatic.  He immediately started ranting and raving at the trembling, five foot nothing man, catching Dawn’s attention as she came out of the ladies room and prompting her to run over and try to defend her best friend.  

That’s when shit _really_ went down. 

In a manner of seconds, a successfully wasted Marianne looked across the smoky bar, saw some scaly-backed cockroach guy shouting at her sister and a royal tigress was unleashed.  She practically flew across the room and started shrieking and cussing at the freakishly tall stick bug.  The angry, drunk screaming escalated to Marianne’s killer right hook crashing into Bog’s face, which led to her getting whacked in the stomach with his pool cue… 

… _aaaaaaaaand_ then the _whole_ bar pretty much got into one hell of a crazy, all-out brawl after that, until the cops showed up and hauled everyone to jail, Bog and Marianne included.  Only Dawn and Sunny were spared, due to the fact that they’d both fled outside and called the police in the first place once the fight broke out.          

“Yeah, even _I_ was bummed when I found out about that shirt later.”  Marianne snickered, running a hand through her razor-cut bob.  “1972 North American Exile Tour!  Do you have any idea how much that thing was worth?” 

“Yes,” Sunny grumbled, “you made me _pay_ for it, remember?  Twenty-five hundred dollars!” 

“Hey, _I_ wanted _five_ grand fer thah sentimental value, but yer sister-in-law talked me down.  So ye can quit yer belly-achin'!  Dare, Dawn.” 

Dawn’s evil grin returned tenfold.  At last, it was time.

“Bog, how scared of Marianne are you?”

“…Is tha’ a trick question?”

“It’ll determine your Dare.”

“Oh?  Well then, bring it on.  I’m no’ scared of a wee princess like her.”

“I’ll show _you_ a wee princess!”  Marianne barked.

“Well then, if you’re not _scared_ ,” Dawn held up her sister’s cell phone for him to see, “I Dare _you_ to send _this_ text message, from _Marianne’s_ phone, to _this_ person.”

Bog’s eyes blew open wide.

“ _What_ person?”  The cell’s owner demanded, trying to read whatever was on the screen.  “What did you write?!”

And Dawn, with all the pomp and charisma of a Disney villain, stood up and proudly showed the others just what she’d done with her sister’s phone:

On the screen, ready to be sent with the touch of a button, was a single text message:

_~Darling, I want you back!  XOXO <3 ~_

to: Roland

from: Marianne

Sunny’s jaw fell open and Bog was still frozen with shock even as Dawn placed the phone into his hand.

“Whoa.”

“Holy shit.”

“ARE YOU FUCKING  _CRAZY_?!”  Marianne screeched.  “HOW THE HELL DID YOU EVEN-?!”

“His number was only two digits off from mine, remember?”  Dawn preened.  “Text book goody-two-shoes, huh?  Serves you right!” 

After Roland’s infidelity, the fucker made about a hundred thousand and one lame attempts to win Marianne back.  Or, to be more direct, win her father’s _inheritance_ back.  At first, it was enraging, then it was irritating, and then, it was just so damn pathetic, it was kind of hilarious.  Especially when he _finally_ stopped trying to contact her, two years ago.  They’d all had lots of laughs about him in his absence.    

So much for _that_ brief period of insurmountable peace.  For Marianne, this would be like dumping itching powder down her shirt.

“Bog.”  She warned in a low and dangerous voice as her fingers curled against the table-top like claws.  “ _Surrender_ that phone, and nobody gets hurt.”

“Yeah, go ahead, Bog.” Dawn encouraged, examining her nails.  “Forfeit the bet, lose the game and be forever branded: pussy-whipped.”

“You shut your mouth!”  Marianne snarled.  “I'll deal with you, later!  Bog, I _mean_ it!  Gimme that phone!”

She stabbed her hand out, waiting for him to drop the phone into her upturned palm.

Bog's eyes went back and forth between his girlfriend and her phone for a long minute before a sly look took over his face and he stood up.

“ _Bog_!”  Marianne repeated, jumping to her feet as well.  “Hand. It. Over!  I won’t tell you again!”

Keeping his gaze dead-locked on her, Bog wiggled his thumb over the ‘SEND’ button on the screen.

“Don’t you _dare_!” 

Marianne darted round the table, snatching at the phone.

With his impressive height, it was incredibly easy for Bog to play keep-away; spinning around with his arm out while his girlfriend grabbed and cursed.  They reached a stand-still when Bog suddenly stretched his hand straight up overhead.  Even hopping up and down on her tiptoes, Marianne’s fingers barely passed his elbows. 

 “Give it!  Give it!”

“No way, Tough Girl!”

She didn’t dare punch him, or kick him in the shins, despite the heavy temptation.  The last thing she wanted to do was make him mad enough to send the text out of spite.

While the two kept busy bickering, Sunny crawled over to Dawn with a look of pure, unadulterated awe on his face. 

“Oh my God!”  He whispered.  “I can’t believe you _did_ that!  That was _diabolical_!”

“It was _genius_!  Like I said, the best way to get one of us to win this, is to pit them against each other!” 

“Bog, I swear to God, I will climb up there and _end_ your entire _existence_!” 

“Hey!”  Sunny hissed, nudging his wife excitedly.  “I’ve got an idea for the next round!” 

“Let me hear it!”

He quickly muttered his plan behind his hand and into her ear, just as Marianne finally manage to snatch away the phone.

“Ah- _ha_!”

* _ding-ding_ *

“Wait, what did you-?!”

Bog pumped both of his fists in the air.

“I am invincible!”

“You…you _didn’t_!”

The speech bubble on the screen said it all.

“OH, YOU GIANT _ASS_!!!”

Shrieking like a banshee, Marianne tackled Bog to the floor. 

“Hey, hey!  Watch it!”  Dawn yelled as the two bandmates wrestled around on the rug.  “You’re gonna knock something over!  If you break it, you buy it!”

Sunny just howled with laughter and banged his fist on the coffee table until they were interrupted a few seconds later.

Everyone froze as Marianne’s phone suddenly buzzed and lit up with Roland’s name across the display screen and Rod Stewart’s raspy voice filled the room.

_If ya want my body, and ya think I’m sexy~_

“What the-?  _Dawn_ , did you _change_ my _ringtone_?!”

“Yup!”

“ _NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_ ”

_If ya really need me just reach out and touch me~_

“WHERE’S A HAMMER?!  I NEED A HAMMER!  SOMEBODY GET ME A _HAMMER_!”

“It’s in the van.”

“JESUS H. CHRIST!  IS THERE ANYTHING YOU TWO IDIOTS _DIDN’T_ LEAVE IN THE FUCKING VAN?!”

“Oh, Maria- _anne_!”  Bog cooed and his girlfriend spun around to see him holding up the ringing phone.  “Come on!  Don’t ye wanna say ‘hi’ to yer ex-boyfriend?  See how the ol’ dick-bag is doin’?” 

His finger teasingly aimed for the ‘ANSWER’ button.

“ _YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH_!!!”

Wailing her battle-cry, Marianne barreled into Bog’s stomach, knocking him down again so hard, the phone flew out of his hand and skid across the floor. 

As they rolled around, Dawn, unable to contain her glee, winked at her husband in congratulations for his brilliant idea.  They would win for sure now. 

The match came to a halt when Marianne managed to straddle Bog and wrap her hands around his throat and thumped his head against the rug.  Dawn wasn’t worried about them actually hurting each other; if Marianne was truly mad, there’d be a lot more blood, loose teeth, and Bog certainly wouldn’t be smiling and chuckling while she choked him. 

The sight was absolutely cartoonish, especially since Bog’s voice was high and squeaky in Marianne’s stranglehold. 

“I"- _OOF_ -"luv"- _OOF_ -"how"- _OOF_ -“ye”- _OOF_ -“seem”- _OOF_ -“to”- _OOF_ -“’ave”- _OOF_ -“forgotten”- _OOF_ -“tha’”- _OOF_ -“we”- _OOF_ -“moved”- _OOF_ -“across”- _OOF_ -“the”- _OOF_ -“country”- _OOF_ -“six”- _OOF_ -“months”- _OOF_ -“ago”- _OOF_ -“so”- _OOF_ -“there’s”- _OOF_ -“no”- _OOF_ -“way”- _OOF_ -“he”- _OOF_ -“can”- _OOF_ -“find”- _OOF_ -“us”- _OOF_ -“and”- _OOF_ -“ye’ve”- _OOF_ -“been”- _OOF_ -“wantin’”- _OOF_ -“a”- _OOF_ -“new”- _OOF_ -“phone”- _OOF_ -“anyway”- _OOF_ -“so”- _OOF_ -“ye”- _OOF_ -“can”- _OOF_ -“change”- _OOF_ -“yer”- _OOF_ -“number”- _OOF_ -“too!” 

“Be quiet!  I’m trying to really kill you this time!”

“Promises, promises, princess!” 

At that, Bog flipped her over his head with a heave and twisted around to pin her shoulders to the floor, but Marianne planted her feet and pushed herself up in an attempt to switch positions.  As their horsing around grew more and more wild, Sunny chewed his lip when he started to see a little tickling added to the mix. 

“Dawn, we better put and end to this soon.”  He suggested, picking up Marianne’s phone so he could dismiss the call and shut it off.  “You know when they fight, they get _horny_.”

“Oh, gross!”  Dawn winced.  “I forgot all about that!  Hey, you two, that’s enough!” 

Her command was completely ignored as Marianne chose that very moment to shove her hand under Bog’s shirt and skitter her fingers over his extremely sensitive back. 

Yelping, Bog surged forward and the rock star couple tumbled head over heels into a mountain of loaded cardboard boxes in the corner, sending them crashing to the floor.

Patience lost, Dawn shot up and roared:

“ ** _ALRIGHT, KNOCK IT OFF!!!_** ”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it's understood that Dawn knows Marianne is absolutely NOT heartbroken over Roland anymore, otherwise, she NEVER EVER would have come up with that Dare. She's not that cruel. 
> 
> Hope you guys liked it. Final chapter coming up next!  
> Comments and kudos are life, won't you please donate? ;D  
> <3


	5. Chapter 5

A lot of issues had to be addressed before the game could resume; issues such as: restacking the toppled boxes in the living room, bathroom breaks, replenishing drinks, and vehemently convincing Marianne that the garbage disposal was absolutely _not_ an option for disposing of her now “haunted by an asshole” phone.  It was soon sentenced to death by regular trash can. 

The musician couple bickered and snarled at each other the whole time, though they were careful to lower their voices within Dawn’s earshot.  Neither one wanted to endure another fiery verbal thrashing like the one they’d received for accidentally messing up her living room.  She might be a dainty fairy princess, but when Dawn got really mad, she could scare the black hell out of a slapped grizzly bear.

In Marianne’s case, she looked about ready to shove Bog’s head in a blender; an observation that had Sunny biting his tongue hard enough not to burst into a fit of smug, gleeful laughter.  The situation was going to be perfect for his and Dawn’s final plan.  He’d ironed out the details with his wife while they were alone in the kitchen getting everyone some more soda. 

Dawn had been right.  There were actually two games going on: the one they were all playing together, and the one Bog and Marianne were playing against each other.  At the moment, the Scotsman was in the lead, but there was one, single thing they knew would torment _him_ more than Roland could torment Marianne.  The trick was going to be how to subtly instigate it into Dawn’s next Dare.  They’d have to be clever for this to work.  Clever and careful.  

“Alright, are we all ready to continue?”  Dawn asked with an edge in her voice once everyone had sat back down. 

“Yes ma’am.”  Sunny replied cheerfully, while Bog and Marianne just sullenly nodded like two scolded children.

“Good, then go ahead, Bog.”

“Truth or Dare, Sunny?”  The amount of interest Bog put into the question was almost insultingly low.  His glaring attention was focused solely on Marianne and vice versa.

“I guess I’ll go with……Dare.”

“Fine.”  Bog said and without looking, jabbed a finger over to the box where Dawn had gotten that picture of Marianne from earlier.  “Ge’ out all thah photo albums in tha’ box an’ show us yer most embarrassin’ ones from childhood.  A few weeks ago, Pare let i’ slip tha’ ye used tah wear dresses.  I wanna see fer myself if it’s true."

Sunny winced, but was secretly thankful that Bog was only half-invested, at the moment.  It could’ve been a lot worse, though he was still gonna _kill_ Pare for this later.

Dawn chuckled as her husband got up with a heavy sigh and rummaged through the box, coming back with three albums.  She’d seen every last one of Sunny’s most humiliating pictures, so she’d make sure he wouldn’t skip any.

“Here.”  Sunny grumbled, setting all three albums on the table and opening each one to the appropriate section and inwardly bemoaning the fact that his wife was so damn organized. 

He turned beet red as everyone cooed and cackled at the various photos of him in diapers, naked in the bathtub, or covered in food sitting in his highchair, but once they’d turned a few pages into the third album, sure enough, there they were: exactly 23 pictures of a 4-7 year old Sunny, wearing various bright, frilly dresses, adult high-heels, gaudy jewelry, and horrifically applied make-up.

Bog just about bust a gut from laughing, and Marianne wasn’t far behind. 

“Aw, shut up!”  Sunny grouched as they wolf-whistled.  “I had three older sisters and all girl cousins!  Leave me alone!”

“I think you make an adorable little drag queen!”  Dawn offered, trying to help, but only succeeding in making Bog and Marianne shriek even louder.   

“Could…?”  Marianne coughed, wiping tears of mirth from her eyes.  “Could I…get some…copies of these?”

“Hell no!”  Sunny snapped, slapping the albums shut and gathering them into his arms.  “They’ll cost you twenty-five hundred dollars _apiece_!”       

“We jus’ _might_ open a new savings account!”  Bog joked, patting his chest to help his breathing get back to normal. 

“Not if I burn ‘em all first.”  Sunny mumbled, dropping the albums back into their box and slouching back to the coffee table.  “Truth or Dare, Marianne?” 

“Well, since your just gonna Dare me to tell a Truth anyway, I’ll go ahead and pick Truth.”  

“Does Bog ever cry during sex?”

“Why ye little fucker!”

“All the time.”

“Shut thah hell up, Marianne!”  Bog growled, ears burning.  “I do _not_!”

“You should've seen him last year, on his birthday.”  Marianne went on, completely ignoring him.  “I thought I was at Niagara Falls!”

“Aw, Boggy!”  Dawn comforted, reaching over to pat his arm while Sunny and her sister nearly sobbed with laughter.  “That’s so sweet!”

“Cut it out!”  He barked, ducking away from her.  “I dorn’t cry durin’ sex, goddamnit!”

“It’s really nothing to be embarrassed about!  Sometimes, Sunny does it too!”

“ _DAWN_!”  Her husband cried in mortification while Bog smirked and Marianne squealed with glee as she fell over backwards.

“Stop…stop!”  The brunette wheezed, weakly waving an arm in a gesture of surrender.  “I can’t……I can’t breathe!  Let’s just…just…keep going……before I…break my ribs!  D-Dawn……Truth or……Truth or…Dare?”

“Dare!”

Like magic, Marianne recovered from her fit and sat up straight to look her little sister dead in the eye.  She looked like a rattler about to snatch a mouse.    

“Since I owe you for that stunt you pulled with my phone, I Dare you to stand on the front porch steps and count to ten.”

Dawn’s face turned milk-white.

“But it’s pouring out there!”

“That’s the idea.”

“I’ll ruin my _hair_!”

“Then forfeit, and I’ll wi- _in_!”  Marianne sang. 

When Dawn’s face crumbled after a long pause, Sunny was momentarily horrified to think that she was about to quit, but he was proven wrong when, with a whining pout worthy of Cher from Clueless, Dawn shot up and stomped out of the room to the hallway.  Honestly, he was pretty shocked that she opted to go through with the Dare.  Dawn was an absolute nutcase when it came to the perfection of her hair.    

Now was their chance!

“Better send Bog with her to make sure she doesn’t count too fast.”  Sunny advised quickly, hating that he was ensuring the ruination of his wife’s immaculate updo, but this was a golden opportunity and he knew she’d probably be more pissed off if he missed it. 

_We’ll get ‘em back, baby.  Your hands and hair shall be avenged!_

“Good idea, Sunny. Bog, get going!”

The Scotsman stood up with a dramatic flair.

“I am a strong, independen’ man!”  He stated with mock indignation.  “No’ jus’ yer stopwatch-sex toy!”

“Hey, make me a sandwich while you’re at it!”  Marianne shouted after him with a laugh as he hurried after Dawn.

Sunny gulped in a mouthful of air as soon as he heard the front door shut.  It was now or never.  He started snickering to himself. 

“What’s so funny?”  Marianne asked. 

“I was just thinking…you know that time we all went to the Skull Cavern to celebrate Brutus acing his finals?”

“Oh, yeah!  That was so much fun!  They had that karaoke contest!” 

“And Gus sang ‘In the Air Tonight’?”

“Then he threw up on the pool table!” 

As Marianne began to chuckle herself, Sunny dropped the bomb.

“Do you remember the song Dawn picked?”

“Sure!  Wasn’t she awesome?  I’ve already told Bog I want a karaoke machine for Christmas.”

“Remember how much Bog hated it?”

“Oh God, yes!  It was fucking hilarious!  He was…”

Sunny did a mental happy dance as Marianne trailed off and a downright wicked gleam filled her eyes.

_Bingo!_

They both flinched at the sound of the front door opening and closing, followed by the splish-splish-splish of Dawn's sopping wet footsteps coming down the hall.  She stormed passed the archway on her way to the bedrooms, looking every bit like a drowned kitten. 

“Put on more than just one layer of dry clothes!”  Bog called after her, as he re-entered the living room and plopped back down on the floor. “We dorn’t want ye tah catch a cold!”

“Baby, I unpacked your bathrobe!”  Sunny yelled.  “It’s on the dresser!”

In his opinion, Marianne was doing a stellar job keeping her intentions hidden from Bog while they waited for Dawn to reappear.  Only from Sunny’s vantage point could one see the way her knee was bouncing with excitement.  Guess it was also a good thing that her boyfriend was too busy guzzling down his third Pepsi. 

When Dawn finally came back, she was sporting her pink bunny slippers, her sky-blue robe with the fluffy white clouds all over it, and a sunshine yellow towel wrapped around her head.  Somehow, she always managed to look as colorful as a second grader’s art project. 

“So how’s the weather out there?”

Dawn turned to her sister with all the threat of that little girl from The Exorcist, and spoke in a low, flat tone.

“You…will… _pay_ …for… _ruining_ …my… _perm_.”

“I doubt that.”  Marianne scoffed.  “You already played your ace, now you’re-”

“Are you absolutely positive that I gave you _all_ of your Lana Lizzard pictures?” 

Her sister’s jaw hung silently open as if numb.  Bog snorted to himself. 

“$400 to pay for the next _six_ months’ worth of my salon needs, and the slideshow I made never makes it to YouTube.”

“……I’ll write you a check in the morning.”

“That’s better!”

“ _I’ll_ pay ye $ _500_ tah email ‘em tah me!”

“Fuck off, Bog!”  Marianne hissed.

“Gee, I’d _luv_ to, lass, but…gosh, it’s jus’ so much more _fun_ watchin’ ye _squirm_!”

Sunny bit the inside of his cheek to keep from making any sound whatsoever.

Oh boy, was Bog gonna _get_ it.

“Please, please.”  Dawn said calmly, rapping her knuckles on the table, and successfully getting both Bog and Marianne to sit back; no doubt they were still fearful of her earlier outburst.  “Let’s just get back to the game before I drain all your accounts.  Bog, Truth or Dare?”

“Dare, princess.”

“Fine, I Dare you to…um…”

A hand slapped down on Dawn’s wrist.  Her sister’s hand.

“What the-?  Marianne, let go!”

“I’ve got the perfect idea for a Dare!”

“Oh, now _this_ should be interestin’!”

“If you think-” Dawn grunted, uselessly trying to wrench her arm away, “that I’m gonna listen to you after-!” 

With her superior strength, Marianne was able to pull Dawn a little closer, despite her struggling, to whisper in her ear.

And in the matter of a millisecond, Sunny and his wife’s eyes met and he winked.  Dawn’s eyes cleared in understanding and her innocent mask was slipped back into place.

Bog and Marianne didn’t notice a thing.

Showtime.      

With more poise than Grace Kelly, Dawn leaned back and gave Bog the most chillingly, glittering smile any of them had ever seen.

“Sunny?”  She said without taking her eyes of an increasingly disturbed Bog.  “May I borrow your phone, please?”

“Certainly, babe.”

“Wha’ are ye doin’?”  Bog asked as Dawn typed into the newly acquired device. 

“Bog, I Dare you…”

Rising to her feet, she pressed one last button

“…to make it all the way through _this_.”

“Make it through wha’?  Wha’ are ye goin’ to-?”

And then it happened, the building piano, guitar and violin chords, punctuated by drums and a tambourine, came pouring forth from Sunny’s phone.  Specifically, his karaoke app. 

Bog's face lost all trace of color.

The one song on earth he loathed more than anything in existence. 

“Oh, no!  No-no-no!”

Slipping the phone into the front pocket of her robe, so Bog wouldn’t be able to make a swipe for it, Dawn tore off her towel with a flourish and filled the room with her belting soprano.

_Oooooooooooooooh!  
Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch!_

“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

_You know that I love you!_

Dawn strutted towards a panicking Bog, swinging her hips and shoulders to the beat.

_I can't help myself,  
I love you, and nobody else_

“OH GOD!  MY EARS!”

Bog smacked his hands over them and tried to clumsily scramble away from the advancing blonde.  She followed him into the hallway and it was like witnessing one of those Scooby Doo cartoon sequences.  Bog ran shrieking back and forth across the archway while Dawn danced and sang after him.

“AAAH!  GE’ AWAY FROM ME!”

 _In and out my life,_  
_You come and you go,_  
_Leaving just your picture behind,_  
_And I've kissed it a thousand times_

Between his own sobs of hysterical laughter, Sunny glanced over at Marianne, who was doing a marvelous impression of Maleficent’s witch cackle.  This genius plan, was going off without a hitch, and she still wholeheartedly believed that it was all of her own design!

Bog tripped and had to come crawling back into the living room on his hands and knees, whimpering like a child, Dawn right on his heels.

 _When you snap your finger, or wink you eye,_  
_I come a-running to you_  
_I'm tied to your apron strings,_  
_And there's nothing that I can do_

The poor Scotsman tried unsuccessfully to use Sunny and then Marianne as human shields, but was swatted away for his trouble.  So, he settled for trying to wedge himself under the couch. 

_I can't help myself,  
No, I can't help myself_

Marianne seized his ankles and hauled him back, despite his agonized protests…

…just as Dawn retrieved the phone and shimmied out of her robe, revealing her matching satin, baby-blue camisole and pajama shorts. 

Her sister and husband cheered and clapped while Dawn stood over Bog and slid her fingers into her wet hair as he kept trying to wriggle away. 

 _'Cause, Sugar Pie Honey Bunch,_  
_I'm weaker than a (girl) should be_  
_I can't help myself,_  
_I'm a fool in love 'ya see_

When Bog managed to get up, he broke for the kitchen, but Dawn grabbed him by the back of his jeans.  He flailed and hopped around like a blind grasshopper, but Dawn’s grip was unbreakable when she wanted it to be.

“LEMME GO!  LEMME GO!”  
  
_Wanna tell you I don't love you,_  
_Tell you that we're through,_  
_And I try...._  
_But ev'ry time I see your face,_  
_I get all choked up inside_

Dragging Bog over to one of the numerous boxes in the room, Dawn gracefully reached inside and pulled out a pink, feather boa.

“Oh my God, are you serious?!”  Marianne howled at Sunny.  “You guys brought a feather boa in the house, but not a hammer?!”

“Admit it!  You’re grateful for that right now!”

“…You’re right!  Thank you!”

At that moment, Dawn released Bog and the forward momentum sent him crashing into Sunny’s La-Z-Boy.  By the time he righted himself, he squeaked in terror as Dawn advanced on him, working that boa like a professional.

 _When I call your name,_  
_(Boy,) it starts to flame_  
_Burning in my heart,_  
_Tearing it all apart_  
_No matter how I try,_  
_My love I cannot hide...._

Then, Dawn plopped down into his lap and cuddled into him, while Bog’s hands flew out as if she was radioactive.  He awkwardly scooped her up using only his forearms and deposited her back in the chair.

_'Cause Sugar Pie Honey Bunch,  
You know that I'm waiting for you _

Dawn jumped up as Bog made one more attempt at an escape and tossed the boa at him.  The fluffy, girly abomination got tangled around his head as he stumbled and wailed in fright.  He tripped again and landed flat on his back.

 _I can't help myself,_  
_I love you and nobody else_  
  
“OKAY, OKAY!”  Bog finally screamed, head popping out from his ridiculous new scarf.  “I GIVE!  I **_GIVE_**!  YE WIN, MARIANNE, ALRIGHT?  YE _WIN_!  JUS’ _PLEASE_ , MAKE IT _STOOOOOOP_!!!”

Now giggling uncontrollably, Dawn stopped the music and sat down just as Marianne fluidly rose and sauntered over to her cringing and sniveling boyfriend. 

“Damn right you give.”  She declared, planting a foot on his chest and leaning over to smirk down at him.  “Cuz I’m the motherfucking _queen_ , bitch!”

Smiling like the Cheshire Cat, Dawn nudged her husband and whispered:

“And _that’s_ how you win a war.”

Sunny shook her hand in congratulations.

“You were brilliant!” 

“Zank you, dahling!”  She crooned in her Natasha voice.  “But I nevar coold ‘ave done eet wizout yoo, my sveet Boris!.” 

* * *

 An hour later, Sunny and Dawn were settling down for the night in their newly furnished master bedroom. 

“Good night, Sunny Wunny! Love you!”

“I love you too, Dawn. Sleep tight.”

…

…

…

*thump-thump-thump*

“Sunny, do you hear something?”

*thump-thump-thump*

“Sunny!”

*thump-thump-thump*

“Huh?”

*thump-thump-thump*

“Listen!”

*thump-thump-thump*

“What  _is_  that?  A branch hitting the roof or something?”

*thump-thump-thump*

“Probably, I’ll go ch-”

“Oh!”-thump-“Fuck!”-thump-“Bog!”-thump-“Yes!”-thump-“ _Yes_!”-thump-“ _YES_!”

The homeowners’ eyes widened in horror.

“Ye like tha’?”-thump-thump-thump-“Huh, Tough Girl?”

“Ah!”-thump-thump-thump-“Yes!”-thump-thump-thump-“Yes, I love it!”-thump-thump-thump-“I _love_ it!”

“God yer so”-thump-“fuckin’”-thump-“hot”-thump-“when ye”-thump-“ _beat_ me!”

“Mmm!”-thump-thump-thump-“Oh baby, yes!”-thump-“Yes, deeper!”-thump-“ _Harder_!”

*THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP*

“FUCKIN’”-THUMP-“ ** _CHRIST_** ”-THUMP-“ _MARIAAAAAAAANE!”_

“Oh my _G_ _od_!”  Dawn whisper-screeched, diving under a pillow as her sister’s orgasmic screams echoed down the hall.

“Man, it’s _our_ new house!”  Sunny griped.  “ _We’re_ supposed to christen it!”

“We are _never_ playing another game with them again!”

“We’re never letting them _spend the night_ again either!”

“Deal!”

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you thought! I really LOVE hearing from you all! <3  
> 


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